So with each passing day I was feeling better and getting mentally stronger.
For the past few Christmas’s I was dependant on people bringing me my Christmas dinner etc. But this year was going to be different, I was able to leave my home and finally spend it with my dad and step mum. My dad picked me up early doors on Christmas Day and we had a great day.
My step mum played up a lovely dinner and she was surprised with how little I ate, by now that had become normal. Even though I was home by 6pm I loved it. Actually being out of my house on Christmas Day and not being a prisoner in my own home felt absolutely amazing.
Boxing Day morning the gym was open so I decided I was going to go for a swim and have a relaxing day. That night we went to the lodge for a drink with a few members of staff from the gym. And a few of us headed into town. It was the first time I’d been in town at night in about 10 years. My anxiety had begun to kick in and I felt uncomfortable. Trev could see I was uneasy. I decided to head home but left the others to party into the night.
Now I can reflect on it, despite not really enjoying the night (and feeling incredibly old) it was a huge step in the right direction of becoming used to crowds, people and normality..
Over the Christmas period the only day the gym was closed was Christmas Day, I was there every day, swimming and getting fitter. On New Years Eve, a friend of mine had a party at his house and invited me. I tend not to drink any more so I took some fruit juice up with me and seen the new year in with his friends and family..
At the stroke of midnight I sat and thought of the people who were not around any more and also sat in amazement at how far I’d come in under 2 years. From someone who was a housebound recluse, to a person who had come through a life changing operation, spent Christmas with his family and was now a member of a gym, all huge steps into getting my life back, even if it was taking its time, I was feeling pretty good.
Next time I’ll go into how it was now time to up the effort into getting the weight off.